It’s a warm summer night. Nothing but the rattle of a portable air-con, seemingly at the end of its short life too, hanging on just for you. I’ve just finished decorating the house one last time. One last Christmas we will spend together.
It’s 10.24pm. Late. I’ve never been early to sleep (or rise) but now I especially find it hard to close my eyes at night.
I sit at your bedside, observing every breath you take. Tonight you look to be having the most peaceful sleep on earth but I’m scared you will slip away at any moment and now it has been a while since you’ve woken to speak with me… I wonder if you ever will again. I wonder if this is truly where I lose you.
The weekend has come to a close, and for the first time in a long time, it feels like it has flown by.
I babysat my toddler niece lastnight and we also had my teenage niece and nephew stay over. I often forget how moody teens can be! They’re also ruthless toward each other and require a constant referee. The bickering and play-fighting between the siblings quickly turned into hardcore insults and tears.
It’s safe to say that I don’t miss being a child with four siblings and even though my sister and I still push each other’s buttons like crazy, I’m glad to be grown up and out of the wrath of three older bullies- aka, brothers.
Nevertheless, we were able to keep the fun alive this weekend, and move past the short-lived quarrels. But it made me think about the issues we have as adults- the family dysfunction and sibling tension, from harmless disagreements to downright toxic personalities.
This time last year, I was working at Target, listening to Christmas tunes non-stop during shifts leading up to Christmas. I enjoyed it thoroughly because it was one small way I could enjoy the season.
There is nothing like enjoying a Christmas song or two while decorating, cooking, cleaning, etc! It’s a fun way to add a little Christmas into your day and throughout the month.
I’m thinking, there’s one post I’ve always wanted to make and that’s the ultimate Christmas playlist post!
So, incase I ever lose my playlist or anyone would like some suggestions, here are 20+ songs from my Christmas playlist! Feel free to add yours in the comments.
I’ve been a little jaded with my writing since it has become mostly about grief. I write about so much more but I can’t find the balance between highly contrasted subjects like loss and mental health, and hobbies, movies… and Christmas!
In my corner of the world, I am less than an hour into the month of December and it only means one thing- Christmas!